Parenting Parenting

The Secret of Understanding Children


It was a day that I will forever be etched into my being. My husband was out of town visiting his mother and I was parenting my two extraordinary children solo. After three days of embracing high drama, soothing explosive emotions, and relaxing righteous indignation, I was exhausted.

Feeling both physically and emotionally drained I put my children to bed and sat down to meditate and pray. As I melted into the silence I was surrounded by a blissful connection to the creator. I felt my life force reignite and my energy restored. In my mind I asked God what I needed to learn to parent my children. The guidance that followed was surely a message from every child. I share these words to help you see the beauty and the innocence in your children. Here are the words that were shared with me.

When you look at me

Remember how small I really am
Remember how I make you feel when I hug you
Remember how I can melt your heart with love

When you lose your patience

Remember, my hands need to explore
Remember, my mind needs to ask questions

Remember, my soul needs your attention

When the world seems overwhelming

Remember to teach me about God's love
Remember to teach about kindness to others
Remember to teach me that I can make a difference in this world

When we are together

Remember to laugh with me
Remember to cry with me
Remember to celebrate life with me

When we disagree

Remember, I have lessons to learn
Remember, you have lessons to learn also
Remember, I am a blessing

But most importantly at every moment
Remember how very much I love you

Enjoy your children and the wonderful gifts they bring into your life.

Debbie Milam is a pediatric occupational therapist, life coach and educator. Her powerful work has appeared on PBS and in Elle, First For Women, and Ladies Home Journal. She is the author of 7 Secrets to Creating Peaceful Relationships and the creator of The Miracle is You Children's Meditation CD and Moments of Joy Spiritual Exercise Cards. Her uplifting resources make beautiful gifts for both adults and children. Sign up for her free e-zine, http://www.unlimitedinspiration.com and receive the transformational special report 35 Ways to Achieve Instant Calm.


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